87: The GM's staff

The GM's staff
The first panel of episode 452 is on TWC.


For a printed version of the comic, visit the Noob bookstore.

I have moved the character portraits and bios from the xmas 2013 advent calendar here.
GM Malevolent is directly inspired by that evil breed, the Ultima Online GMs.
When I was a newbie in Ultima Online I found them absolutely intimidating. The fact that they were dressed like a cross between an evil cultist and a KKK member who had washed his robe with a red sock didn't help at all. What the hell, they could even put you in prison!
Their responses were completely random (although normally it would be "I can't help you with that") and they seemed to be rather sadistic. Once me and a friend were fighting a guy who said the usual "I'll call my friend who's a GM", and of course we thought nothing of this. A minute later we'd killed the guy and were about to leave when a huge spawn of monsters materialises right on top of us. My friend dies, I manage to survive and run off a bit, just to have another huge spawn of monsters appear on top of me. All this in an area where normally you wouldn't even find these monsters. I guess that the guy had a GM friend after all.


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My pantry is empty,

My clothes are dingy,

and my heart is breaking,

'cause you're so stingy...

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The Noob is dedicated to my friend Gloria Sadun.

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